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Tuesday, March 13, 2007
Lights dim, curtains close
This is a post I have been reluctant to write. I knew this day was coming and I had a plan. Blogging is something that I love to do. Apparently over the last 2 years I have been told that I've (we've) helped so many people. I'm glad that I could share some wisdom, humor and support to those touched by adoption. I think that is what makes this difficult.

We have decided to close this chapter in our lives. Keeping up with 2 blogs is difficult. I love the extra comments our faithful readers leave, but I am spending too much time at the computer and the warmer weather is quickly approaching.

This place, and Adoption Adventure, are all about our story to bring a child into our home. Now that he is here I feel ready to take on that new roll of mama. Sure, I've been a mama for 6 months now, but at some point you go from adoptive mama to just plain ol' mom. This is where I am now.

So why did I pick today to end this chapter? One year ago today we sat in a small purple room in our house and heard news that would forever change our lives. One year ago today we lost Alexander. It felt as if our entire world had come crashing down around us.

One year later I hear the quiet sound of my son sleeping. I see toys scattered about my house. I am wearing a tattered sweatshirt and am lucky that I combed my hair this morning. From my vantage point I see photos of my beautiful little boy plastered on a bulletin board by my desk. Quietly tucked away within those photos is one of a little boy whom we grew to love. A little one who lives in Russia with a forever family. One who never has to wake up in an orphanage again. His little eye peeks out from behind another photo as if to tell me, I remember you and I won't forget you either.

I still grieve for that little boy. I miss him terribly and on occasion I get the feeling of, "I lost my son." I will never forget his little face or his big brown eyes. But I know that he is happy. He has a family to love and care for him. That is what helped me get past his loss.

If it were not for Alexander we would have not made it through the months of waiting. In all likelihood we would have given up. We would have never met Oleg. Today I honor the little boy we lost. I look at the little boy that has become our son and smile. Because of one we have the other. I love them both so much.

I want to thank all of our faithful readers over the last 2 years. Does this mean we will quit blogging. Oh no. You should know better than that. It just means that there will be no more new Unexpected Miracles posts. This isn't to say that the unexpected miracle may never come our way again.

We invite you to come with us on our journey of parenthood. You can find my (Elle's) take on it at Life of Elle (no password required). Or you can follow Derek's ramblings on pointing out people's stupidity at Protesting Stupidity.

If you want more information about Russian adoption, our journey or our transition to parenthood you can always email me at
Blogger Starfish said...
Since you will still be blogging over at Life of Elle, I am not sad. In fact, I am happy that you are able to close this chapter of your life with such a happy ending!

Blogger Carrie said...
Funny how parenting takes up so much time eh! I'm glad that you will still be with us over at "Life of Elle". It must be quite emotional to close the door on this chapter of your journey. Thanks for sharing it with us!

Anonymous The Other Elle said...
See ya on the other "Elle"...and have fun being "plain ol' mom!"

Blogger Michelle Smiles said...
As long as Life of Elle remains, I think everyone in blog world will be happy. I think it is awesome that you are just a plain old mom now. :)

Blogger Tricia said...
i was just thinking about last year and how different all of our lives were. you, rhonda, lauri, jen, margaret... your journey to little a and oleg were amazing experiences and i'll glad that you shared them with me. i've not only learned about the process, but strength, faith and true character.

i'm sure sure don't have time to read all of this sentimental stuff so i will stop... surely you must have some pee to clean up.

Blogger AEmom said...
congrats on just being "mom" its a nice feeling isn't it? I remember when it finally hit me that I wasn't "adopting" anymore, and I was just mom. Now if I could just get done with my current adoption, I'll be back to being "mom" also. I'll be reading over at LOE.

Anonymous Anonymous said...
This is not the end but the beginning! Many people have been touched and encouraged by your stories so they too will continue with their adoption journey! Unexpected Miracles has also provided a great release for you when things became seemingly unbearable... only to show what great strengths you and Derek have as husband and wife. Now look at what you have...Oleg!!!!!!!!!! He's absolutely priceless, beautiful, enchanting, and the love of his Grandma and Grandpa's eyes!!!!!!!!! Thanks for not giving up!!!
Mom and Mike

Blogger Pat & Alli said...
Thanks for sharing your journey to becoming a plain ol' mom. I'll be following along at Life of Elle for sure. Perhaps a "More Unexpected Miracles" some day....

Blogger Melissa said...
As sad as I am to see you close the curtain, it is completely understandable! And really, we get boy stories on your other blog I guess as long as you have Life of Elle, we'll all be okay. :)

Thanks for sharing all your stories throughout your process ... You know how I feel about this blog, it (well, and you in general!) has been a tremendous help to me throughout our own process! I can only hope that I will help as many people - through my blog - as you have through yours!'s not "goodbye"...just "see ya at the other homestead!" :)

Blogger Christen & Frank said...
see you at Life of Elle :)

Anonymous Anonymous said...
Its been great following your journey. The day I lost my first referral is etched in my mind too. I wish the little one I lost was in a forever home. I recently learned she is still in an orphanage. Likely will always be there. I'm glad I perservered to another adoption as well. The joy is untold.

Its been great hearing how you and your family have grown together. I always appreciate you sharing your views on adoption. Best to you always.

Blogger mommyto5 said...
Yes a little sad here too, but it is a new beginning for you. Have enjoyed your blog and don't forget you were my inspiration to start my own little blog. Love you guys!
(((hugs))) Will see ya at the other site:)

Blogger Rhonda said...
I'll see you at Life of Elle. This site has been tremendously helpful for so many of us. Your Unexpected Miracle is inspiring, and I am so happy that he's home :)

Blogger jeneflower said...
You have really helped and inspired so many people! SO SO SO many people. I am a little bit sad about your site closing, but I know it is time to move on.

I love Tricia's comment! We are the original Russian Adoption blogger group and I hope you never stop blogging so we can always stay in touch!

You just answered my earlier question- you have been home six months. Wow that time went fast. At least the last two months of it.

Pineapple will be home six months right when we move to Korea so that sounds about the right time to close up shop on adoption blogging and change direction too.

Sorry such a long comment! I am so happy that your blog ended happy after all of the waiting and struggles. Truly an unexpected miracle!

Anonymous annmarie said...
It's been a long journey and it's great to be able to look ahead. I'll see you over at the other blog!

Blogger kate said...
Catch you on the flip side. Glad you're still around. PLEASE keep rooting us on. I think those of us who adopt "elephants" need to stick together.

Blogger Susan&Wayne said...
Yes, you were my inspiration!! I am happy for you!!

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