The people that got us through

that either one of us could be responsible for another human life. We are talking about the couple where he can't remember more than 3 things on a shopping list and where she has the attention span of a cricket.

I am starting to realize that at any moment we could get a phone call that says we are going to be parents. For those of you who gave "natural" childbirth imagine this as the hospital calling you and saying, "Hey Lady, you're in labor." Yeah like that, only you had to get on a plane, fly 16 hours, change days, not just time zones, sit in front of a judge and then some one hands you the child and HOLY COW! that thing weighs 20 pounds! And it walks.

Our house is in no way shape or form ready to house a toddler unit. My teapots are still in sticky finger reach, there aren't nearly enough cabinet latches on, well... cabinets. The only thing I can dutifully boast is the parentproof childproof outlet covers. Another test of my parenting inability. I can't get the dumb things off to vacuum my carpet. Thus a really nasty rug.

I firmly believe I am going to produce world's most warped unique individual. Apparently I have a bit of work to do in the next few weeks to prepare myself for a little tornado. Is there an Idiot's Guide to Parenting out there?